it's been a while

and finals are approaching
and school is ending.


the sun shines brightly, then is covered with clouds.
the clouds rain on the sidewalk and my head
the sidewalk smells like wet concrete
the wind blows the rain sideways and the smell to my nose
i smile and the water soaks through my clothes to my skin
i walk forward.


time goes by so quickly
relationships are formed and then fade
whisps of emotion on the winds of time.
life is a whirlwind
and i cannot live with regret
or without hope.







ok sorry, back to your normal programming.
once in a while i need to vent some abstract strange attempt at poetic thing.

i've learned a lesson this past couple weeks from a friend of mine. he didn't try to teach me, but i learned through his example.
lesson: love fiercely and wholeheartedly, purely and deeply.
i want to respect everyone that i know. i want to care for them and love them, even if i get hurt in the process. i want to take an interest in what hurts they may have and what joys they feel. That means you. You who take enough interest in me to read what strangeness I have to write here in my obscure corner of the internet.
This resolve may not change much of my day to day life, but just know that I think about you sometimes. That I wonder how you've been. How you've REALLY been, not just the things you write on your blogs or the things you laugh about with your friends on facebook. And that i'll always be here to listen if you should choose to share. Because that is what a relationship is... to care for each other enough to share our burdens and our struggles, and to love each other enough to want to share our joys and triumphs.


hrm, i guess i wasnt done with strange abstract and poetic, it just transformed into creepily deep and intense. xD

yeeeyuh.

k so the earlier post was just a mini blurb

felt that i needed to rant about the unfortunate circumstances that sunny days put me in....

but the real reason i wanted to post was to relate the story of saturday.




ahhh...
so saturday was the amazing bear hunt.
no we didnt hunt for bears... (i dont know if that's allowed even...)
it was a scavenger hunt. a massssssive scavenger hunt that lasted for 12 hours and spanned through oakland, emeryville, berkeley, and san fransisco.

they gave us clues and we had to figure them out and take a picture in front of it with three people, with t-shirts visible and a whiteboard with the clue number on it. Problem: we only had three people in our group. usually there would be four people (three in picture one taking picture) but one of our members got sick. so we had to ask people to take the pictures for us. met some interesting folks along the way...

but seriously it was sooo tiring...

about mid afternoon my feet started to hurt.
a few minutes later my ankles were protesting.
several blocks after that my knees told me to sit down....

but i didnt!
i walked miles and miles and miles through shady west oakland and nice-looking bay street in emeryville and all over northside and the hills of berkeley and probably in a gigantic circle around campus at least twice. it felt like i was walking a marathon. T-T

by the end of it i rode the elevator up to the second floor of my building and stumbled into bed with clothes and contacts still on and fell asleep. woke up briefly to go to the bathroom and changed my pants and fell asleep again. woke up at 8 the next morning (just in time for church) with contacts still in and feet still hurting. i had a dream about the scavenger hunt dude.
that is the extent to which it consumed my life that day.

but seriously, never doing that again.
marathon runners, i commend you.
cuz that shit is DIFFICULT.

the weather hates me

every time i prepare for rain, without fail the sky clears up before i have enough time to use my umbrella with any kind of significance.

and everytime it rains, i am left outside, soaking, without a hood or an umbrella or SHOES.




why weather? are you having fun or something? cuz i'm NOT.

i'm tired of waiting

i feel like i'm always waiting for something/someone.
a test coming up, a class i have to go to, a paper i need to write.
a book i need to order from another library, a fundraiser for a club,
summertime...
a boy? a new church, a new fellowship group...
gah.

i'm tired of waiting.




but the only thing i can do to stop waiting, is wait. lol the irony.

dont laugh...

i joined greenpeace today.








*pause for laughter*









well...! $15 a month to save the earth aint so bad....